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Getting a stronger bond with you horse

Do you wish you had a stronger relationship with your horse?

Does it just not feel right or like there’s something missing?

Are you looking for answers to behavioural issues?

Maybe if my horse liked me more it wouldn’t be so skittish and spooky or bargy and pushy?

Developing a relationship with our horses is the long road seldom travelled. Because once you know how to make or manipulate a horse into doing what you want it to you don’t really need to rely on the relationship anymore. The better you get at making horses do things and hanging on to their outbursts the less you need them to be willing because well they actually are willing and the more their willingness comes because they have no other option.

At some stage we will hit a plateau with our horse. At this stage we may sell and try a new horse hoping the next one will be our answer. This can happen several times over, always seeking but never finding that magic that we are looking for of complete union in the saddle.

What your lacking is called connection. It is when your horse is interested and engaged in the learning process, it enjoys moving in harmony with you and its attention and focus is on you always. When you head to the paddock they come to the gate to greet you. When you dismount they give you a soft knicker in appreciation of the ride. Its not this constant fighting and battle that leaves you exhausted and makes just the idea of tacking up feeling like your pulling teeth.

That connection starts with us. We have to put the time and the effort into building a relationship and rapport with our horses. Not leave them feeling like they are a cog in the machine.

When was the last time you sat with you horse just to enjoy being with them?

3 Reasons Your Horse Is Pushing You Around

Do you ever have those moments when your horse comes in close - then nearly stands on your or knocks you over? Or perhaps a horse that pushes ahead of you to get to the gate, even though it is on the lead?

Then you know what it is like to have a pushy horse.

A pushy horse isn’t necessarily nasty, but if the behaviour is left unchecked, it could result in a dangerous situation.

Of course, the last thing we want to have to do is continuously discipline our horse. It feels horrible to constantly tell them off, and it can damage our relationship.

If you know why your horse is pushy, it could save you a lot of time and effort in correcting the issue.

TIP: OUR FREEBIE IN THIS ARTICLE NOT ONLY SHOWS YOU HOW TO START CORRECTING THE BEHAVIOUR, IT DOES SO WITHOUT DAMAGING YOUR RELATIONSHIP OR AFFECTION FOR EACH OTHER!

1. You horse is insecure

An insecure horse is going to push into you for security, or may try to pull away from you to get to a more secure location - such as with the rest of the herd. This can happen when you horse is dealing with separation anxiety, or when they are in a new environment.

Tip: if you work on your horses trust, they will follow your lead more consistently. Work on adventures in our guide to start establishing trust and identify the areas your need to strengthen in your training and relationship.

2. Your horse doesn’t see you as a leader

It may be that your relationship is new, it may be that the herd structure has changed, or it may simply be that your horse has an alpha personality - whichever it is , your horse will, at some point, make you prove you are their leader.

Leadership is based on a level of consistency and knowledge, as well as comfort that you can. If you give the impression you cannot, your horse will look for someone who can - and will take it upon itself to see if it should be the leader instead. It’s instinctive - it is what would happen in a herd.

You can be a strong leader without beating your horse into submission (or scaring it with objects), and you don’t have to turn into a horse to do it either! The Foundations Of Equine Development: Training Trainability provides you with the tools you need to become a human alpha and understand the challenges that face it.

3. You keep giving your horse mixed signals

The biggest mistake I see is a lack of consistency - which is absolutely critical to preventing pushiness.

Your horse doesn’t care about the day that you had a cold and still had to turn up for feed time - but what it does care about is that it was able to push into you to get food quicker, and it worked.

Being consistent means you know what you expect and your expect this EVERY — SINGLE — TIME (perhaps singularly excluding life-threatening situations). Know what your boundaries are, and make sure your horse respects them too.

We hope that you have recieved some insight into why your horse may be pushy - pushing your boundaries, pushing your buttons, and potentially pushing your over. Contact us here if you need any further advice!

How To Identify If Your Relationship With Your Horse Needs Improving

You love your horse. right?

We know you do - it is why we are here, too!

But does your horse love & respect you back?

It may seem a fickle question, but it is one that we should ask.

Our relationship with our horse has a massive impact on our training. And our training has a massive impact on our relationship. Every form of interaction determines what you can expect from your horse in turn.

So, what are the signs you should be looking for that indicate you need to work on your relationship with your horse?

You are regularly frustrated with your horse - or yourself

You try your best, your work yourself and your horse hard, but you just don’t seem to be getting anywhere. Yep, you are feeling the very beginnings of frustration.

Unfortunately, frustration can lead to feelings of irritation, distance or just a lack of appreciation. And don’t think for a moment that your horse isn’t feeling those emotions from you.

If you are getting frustrated or irritated, it is time to step back and focus on the real reason you are here - to love and be loved by that majestic beast in your paddock.

Your horse is “pushy”

Is you horse disrespectful of your personal space? Do they almost step on you when you lead them, or mow you down when you let them out?

Or perhaps they are becoming aggressive and pushy at feed time, knowing that you will hand them their food immediately should they push.

A horse that is not respecting your boundaries may be testing you, but if you are seeing this happen frequently, it’s time to get your horse focusing on respecting you.

Your horse spooks - a lot

It can be scary, frustrating or just plain irritating when our horse regularly spooks. But it is our responsibility, as the leader of your horse-y group, to ensure your horse is confident, relaxed and curious. If you horse is spooking, it is unlikely that it is feeling any of those moods, and means you need to work on your relationship foundations.

You only see your horse at feed-time and for work

Imagine this: You get to see your significant other/best friend/favourite sibling every day for dinner but the only thing you get to do discuss is a business meeting. No “what are we doing this weekend”, “how was your day” or “where shall we take our next holiday”. Just budgets, margin, profits or sales.

It might be ok for a day or two, but would get pretty stale in a short time.

It is exactly the same for our horses when we do nothing more besides work them or feed them. They quickly associate their activity with us with either feeding (YAY!) or work (not always so yay). After a while, they will even get to know your routine, and may start taking diversionary tactics to avoid less ‘pleasant’ time with us.

You’re not ‘in the moment’ with your horse

If you find yourself going through a mental checklist of to-do’s, or constantly worrying about something else, when you are spending time with your horse, chances are you need to refocus on your relationship.

We understand that life is busy and full of stresses, but when you focus on anything but your horse, you are not helping your bond. Unfortunately, our horses can pick up on these sentiments as well, which may exasperate the rift in your bond as well.

So how can we improve or tweak our relationship with our horse? Have a look at this free online course Building Connection